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| "MOMMY" One So Worthy |
"Mother is the name for God on the lips and hearts of all children." Eric Draven
(Brandon Lee) said this line to a woman addicted to heroin in the movie “The
Crow.” His goal was to shock the woman into being a real mother to her daughter.
Many women are mothers. Just as there are fathers and there are Daddies, only
special women can be Mommies. It is weird how so many sperm and egg donors
become parents. However parenting is the last thing on their agenda. I am sure
many of you out there know many people who are rotten parents, yet they have no
trouble having children. Then there are special ladies who would like nothing more
than to be a mother, but for health reasons they cannot have children of their own.
Of all of the great injustices in the universe, this is one that really rubs my rhubarb.
My own mother was severely lacking in the mothering department. But what is it
that makes someone "Mommy?" Just like the unconditional love I spoke of in the
mirage essay and the love writing, being a Mommy means putting your kids ahead
of yourself ALL of the time. If this means going without sleep, you do it. If this
means working three jobs, you do it. If this means putting your own leisure time
aside to play video games with your child, you do it. What really makes someone
Mommy is that they do these things for their kids and enjoy showing that love for
their children. They do not just do these things for the kids, but they do these
things because they enjoy showing their kids love. That total self-sacrifice, that is
being a Mommy. Constantly showing your kids how much they are loved, that is
being a Mommy. Also, watching your every move because you know your little ones
will emulate you, that is being a Mommy.
Jamie cannot have children of her own. Several years ago she talked about her
own broken dreams in the first essay she ever wrote for this website. She was
writing that to encourage her then mentor to keep pushing towards his goals. She
drew on the pain of knowing that if she tried to have kids it would kill her. Most of
her youth, she dreamed of having a baby of her own and being a good mother.
Ever since we became friends I watched Jamie interact with my kids and the children
of others. She has a wonderful way with infants. She has a great way of reaching
out to young kids and getting through to hard-nosed teenage girls. She is not
much on talking, but she is one of the best active listeners I have ever known.
Most impressive though was her self-sacrifice for the sake of my children. Ally is 14,
and Alex is 11. Doing things with both of them is difficult as their tastes are quite
different. Where Alex likes to play video games, Ally likes to go for nature walks.
Time after time Jamie would spend time with Alex while I spent time with Ally, or the
other way around. This way both of the kids got some one-on-one attention from
an adult. I cannot count how many times in the last ten months Jamie would cover
for me at the bowling alley so that I could spend time with my babies. Even on
nights she was having level 8 or 9 pain, she wanted to cover for me so that my kids
would be happy. Time and time again I watched her ALWAYS put her needs behind
the happiness of my kids. My kids, not hers.
Once Alex tried to call her by her first two names, but "Jamie Lee" came out as
"Jambly." Before too long when she and Alex bowled together he would put her
name in as "Momma Jambly." It took Alex a long time to trust another adult female,
but I dare say that now he is as close to her as he is to me. Ally and Jamie act like
best friends or sisters.
It is probably because of her treatment of my kids that I fell so hard for Jamie. That
and the way my kids talk about her. I have never seen anyone care so much for my
children as my Lady Hawk does. She is a good role-model, a good counsel, and
frankly, a good Mommy.
Jamie's decision to move to Graves county with me took me off guard. She is
leaving behind all she knows so that I am happy; and so that my kids are happy.
She tells me that as long as the three of us get quality time together, she will have
all that she needs. Well, Jamie, I have news for you, the kids want the four of us to
have time together.
They are not just my kids anymore. They adore you. You have shown them more
affection than any woman has before. When I am gone, it is good to know that the
part of me that lives in you will be there for them. No one else has ever been so
worthy of the title of Mommy as you, Momma Jambly. Ally and Alex adore you. This,
above all else, is why I love you too. Very soon, the dreams of a happy family that I
always wanted will come true. No more mirages. No more yelling and violence in
their lives. Thank you for making my dreams a reality. Thank you for making their
reality as happy as a dream.
Sponge
05/13/2007
(Brandon Lee) said this line to a woman addicted to heroin in the movie “The
Crow.” His goal was to shock the woman into being a real mother to her daughter.
Many women are mothers. Just as there are fathers and there are Daddies, only
special women can be Mommies. It is weird how so many sperm and egg donors
become parents. However parenting is the last thing on their agenda. I am sure
many of you out there know many people who are rotten parents, yet they have no
trouble having children. Then there are special ladies who would like nothing more
than to be a mother, but for health reasons they cannot have children of their own.
Of all of the great injustices in the universe, this is one that really rubs my rhubarb.
My own mother was severely lacking in the mothering department. But what is it
that makes someone "Mommy?" Just like the unconditional love I spoke of in the
mirage essay and the love writing, being a Mommy means putting your kids ahead
of yourself ALL of the time. If this means going without sleep, you do it. If this
means working three jobs, you do it. If this means putting your own leisure time
aside to play video games with your child, you do it. What really makes someone
Mommy is that they do these things for their kids and enjoy showing that love for
their children. They do not just do these things for the kids, but they do these
things because they enjoy showing their kids love. That total self-sacrifice, that is
being a Mommy. Constantly showing your kids how much they are loved, that is
being a Mommy. Also, watching your every move because you know your little ones
will emulate you, that is being a Mommy.
Jamie cannot have children of her own. Several years ago she talked about her
own broken dreams in the first essay she ever wrote for this website. She was
writing that to encourage her then mentor to keep pushing towards his goals. She
drew on the pain of knowing that if she tried to have kids it would kill her. Most of
her youth, she dreamed of having a baby of her own and being a good mother.
Ever since we became friends I watched Jamie interact with my kids and the children
of others. She has a wonderful way with infants. She has a great way of reaching
out to young kids and getting through to hard-nosed teenage girls. She is not
much on talking, but she is one of the best active listeners I have ever known.
Most impressive though was her self-sacrifice for the sake of my children. Ally is 14,
and Alex is 11. Doing things with both of them is difficult as their tastes are quite
different. Where Alex likes to play video games, Ally likes to go for nature walks.
Time after time Jamie would spend time with Alex while I spent time with Ally, or the
other way around. This way both of the kids got some one-on-one attention from
an adult. I cannot count how many times in the last ten months Jamie would cover
for me at the bowling alley so that I could spend time with my babies. Even on
nights she was having level 8 or 9 pain, she wanted to cover for me so that my kids
would be happy. Time and time again I watched her ALWAYS put her needs behind
the happiness of my kids. My kids, not hers.
Once Alex tried to call her by her first two names, but "Jamie Lee" came out as
"Jambly." Before too long when she and Alex bowled together he would put her
name in as "Momma Jambly." It took Alex a long time to trust another adult female,
but I dare say that now he is as close to her as he is to me. Ally and Jamie act like
best friends or sisters.
It is probably because of her treatment of my kids that I fell so hard for Jamie. That
and the way my kids talk about her. I have never seen anyone care so much for my
children as my Lady Hawk does. She is a good role-model, a good counsel, and
frankly, a good Mommy.
Jamie's decision to move to Graves county with me took me off guard. She is
leaving behind all she knows so that I am happy; and so that my kids are happy.
She tells me that as long as the three of us get quality time together, she will have
all that she needs. Well, Jamie, I have news for you, the kids want the four of us to
have time together.
They are not just my kids anymore. They adore you. You have shown them more
affection than any woman has before. When I am gone, it is good to know that the
part of me that lives in you will be there for them. No one else has ever been so
worthy of the title of Mommy as you, Momma Jambly. Ally and Alex adore you. This,
above all else, is why I love you too. Very soon, the dreams of a happy family that I
always wanted will come true. No more mirages. No more yelling and violence in
their lives. Thank you for making my dreams a reality. Thank you for making their
reality as happy as a dream.
Sponge
05/13/2007
